She Made Sure You Were Seen

I first met Arlene in 1995 at a Trinity Fellowship ladies event.

I didn't know a single person there. I walked in a complete stranger, the way you do sometimes — hoping someone will notice, half expecting no one will.

Arlene noticed.

She took the time. Made sure I felt seen. Made sure I felt like I belonged. That kind of thing sounds simple until you're the person standing alone in a room full of strangers and someone chooses to cross it just for you.

That was her first impression on me.

It held up.

Years later we were in a Bible study together. I was in the thick of it with one of my teenagers — really struggling, the way you do when you've either been one or raised one or both.

I told her what I was going through.

She listened. And then she said:

"The teenage years were my favorite years with my children."

I thought she was joking.

She wasn't.

She meant it. Completely. Without a flicker of sarcasm.

I've thought about that moment more times than I can count — over twenty years later, as I've continued raising teenagers of my own. Something about the way she said it reframed the whole thing for me. Like maybe I was in the middle of something good and just couldn't see it yet.

She was a good, good woman.

And she loved Jesus.

That was never a question.